The Art of Allowing - The Judgment Free Zone: Embracing Yourself and Others
I heard a lovely story the other day and I wanted to share. When we walk through the woods immersing ourselves in the surroundings we take everything for what it is, absorbing the colours, shapes & sounds. We don’t look at every tree and go that’s a fat tree, that’s a skinny tree and that’s a crooked tree. Yet why do we do this with people? To ourselves even. Why are we so good at judging? We give each other stories which are based on our own story and experience.
When you stand back and observe your thoughts what voice do they have?
Your mothers, your fathers, a teachers or a boss?
How do they become our story?
There are a number of theories but a common one is socialisation. From a very young age we are made to feel bad for the innate part of us does not conform with societies expectations. It forms the judge inside us, we all have one. For me I search out situations and people to validate the negative judgments I make about myself. It makes for the merry dance of the mean girl who bullies the anxious over pleaser into action. My only worth coming from external validation.
I hold onto thoughts, hold onto stories which is where the judgment comes in to play.
I aspire to be better person but, I cannot be more than who I am right now.
This is where I allow myself to be human.
By accepting and appreciating all parts of me.
So rather that holding a magnifying glass to the negative judgments I make about myself I choose to refocus it. To magnify all of myself and why not shine a light on the good parts while I am at it. Replace the old thoughts and stories with new ones as they no longer serve me.
Acceptance and appreciation of who I am and the unfolding of my story - allowing myself to be a human being. Acknowledging the fullness, the wholeness of myself The good the bad and the ugly. Gives me perspective to move forward and take inspired action.
So rather than ask myself what can I do today I ask who can I BE.
How do I get to be this? Well it's daily practice. Nothing taxing not hours of meditation or yoga rather things that can be done in minutes. Waking and consciously taking a breathe and setting and intention. Even writing it down. I like to move, yoga, walking moving to 'clear my head'.
All of this I have curated into REAWAKEN JOY
In this mini course, there will be bite- sized prompts and mediations to get you where you want to be.
Look at yourself as a witness rather than a judge then you get to appreciate your uniqueness, its your power.
The Judgment Free Zone: Embracing Yourself and Others
I explore the concept of self-judgment and how it can extend to how we perceive others. It encourages self-acceptance and seeing the beauty in the unique qualities of ourselves and those around us.
Top 7 Questions About Letting Go of Judgment:
1. Why do we judge others so readily?
We often judge others based on our own experiences and biases. It's a way of making sense of the world around us, but it can be limiting and hurtful.
2. How does judging others affect us?
A critical mindset can be exhausting. It prevents us from forming genuine connections and appreciating the richness of human diversity.
3. How can I become more aware of my own judgments?
Pay attention to your self-talk. Whose voice do you hear criticizing yourself and others? Is it an echo of past experiences or societal expectations?
4. What does the story of the walk in the woods illustrate?
When we immerse ourselves in nature, we appreciate the beauty of each tree in its unique form. This can serve as a reminder to extend the same acceptance to ourselves and others.
5. How can I stop judging myself so harshly?
Self-compassion is key. Accept that you are a human being with flaws and imperfections. Focus on appreciating all aspects of yourself, just as you are.
6. What does it mean to be a "witness" to your thoughts?
Imagine yourself observing your thoughts without judgment. This allows you to see them for what they are - fleeting mental patterns - and not facts about who you are.
7. How can I learn to appreciate the uniqueness of others?
Practice curiosity! Seek to understand others' experiences and perspectives. Celebrate the diversity that makes us all unique.
Bonus Tip: Challenge your assumptions! When you find yourself judging someone, ask yourself, "What don't I know about this situation?" Open your mind to the possibility that you might be missing
Rebecca Rodden founder of the Fashion Lifestyle Brand ‘Eluroom’
She brings wealth and knowledge in the Fashion Industry, Spanning 20 years working her way up to Buying Director at a British Luxury Retail Company.
Her knowledge and skills of how and what you wear can set your mood or mindset for the day has become her specialty.
Rebecca, designs her own sustainable fashion dresses and incorporates mindfulness and wellbeing in her brand ethics to connect to her customers on a deeper level.
She promotes ‘Living with Joy’
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